BRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

When I left work at 5 AM this morning there was no doubting that the temperature had dropped drastically overnight, my ears and face immediately felt like what I can only describe as frostbitten. I stepped out of the alleyway and into the street; greeted by an icy wind that body-slammed me and caused me to stagger back several steps before regaining my feet. I ultimately had to hunch over like some wizened old crone and lean into the Arctic blast before making my way toward the clock alley and on to the parking lot. Thank Goddess that someone has scattered rock salt on all the slick patches or else I would have probably broken one of my well padded but semi-elderly hips.

By the time I reached my car all exposed skin was numb & tingly and I felt the first beginnings of that most unbecoming of winter accessories, the dreaded snotsicle, hanging off the end of my nose and my trembling hands had a hard time getting the key in the hole to unlock the car door. I cranked Ozzie up and headed out for the house (at least the wind kept the windshield clear).

About half way home the heater had kicked in and most of my body parts had thawed out except for the blocks of ice where my feet used to be, when I noticed that I had left an almost full Diet Mountain Dew sitting in the console from the day before. Hoping it wouldn’t be too flat I opened the bottle and tipped it up. Nothing came out! Dang, the sucker had frozen overnight! This is supposed to be the Sunny South, what happened to our warm winter that had blessed us so far?

After making it home and taking a long nap with Shitty Kitty snuggling on top of my head ( whither she was keeping me warm or trying to stay warm herself I haven’t a clue, who knows what cats think) I made the mistake of going by Wal-Mart to pick up the pictures from Karen’s surprise birthday party last Friday. I had forgotten that the weather man was predicting snow & ice for tonight and tomorrow.

It’s a long held Southern tradition that anytime anyone anywhere mentions the remote chance of frozen precipitation of any kind falling within a 100 mile radius of your home that one absolutely MUST rush out and buy bread and milk (don’t ask me why, I keep my pantry stocked enough to last for weeks anyway). The parking lot was packed, checkout lines snaked all the way across the store, all the bread and milk was gone and folks were scuffling to get checked out and home so they could sit in front of the Weather Channel and watch the white & pink smudges on the weather map approach Alabama. People were on their cell phones reminding others to hurry and get stocked up on provisions because “It’s gonna snow!” Heck, nothing has fallen yet and they're already either delaying school openings or canceling school altogether.

I managed to grab my pictures and get out so I could make it to work on time. I just hope my relief makes it here in the morning, I don’t feel like getting “snowed in” here at work. Alabama don’t have the equipment or the manpower to clear the roads or scatter salt like the states up North (we don't get enough of the frozen stuff to make our politicians put out that kinda money) and we usually don’t get snow, we get ice storms. I promise you that if I can get out of here, I WILL MAKE IT HOME. The only problem is that the Rednecks around here don’t know how to drive on ice, so it makes for some interesting visuals. Nothing like sitting at a stop sign and watching in the rear view mirror as a 4X4 truck slides toward you sideways with no way to get out of it’s path.......



Most of the pictures came out dark, so I'll have to do a little editing when I get home. This is Karen as the staff of the Mexican restaurant sang "Happy Birthday" to her. (As usual, click on the picture to see a larger view)

PS: MIDNIGHT AND IT'S SNOWING HERE IN NORTH ALABAMA!

AND MY FINE IS...............

I "lifted" this from the Grumpy Old Bitches blog (don't know what the fine is for bloglifting!). I thought it was just too cute to pass up! Plus it'll be interesting to see how our "fines" compare to each others.........

Below is a list of *ahem* activities, each awarded a penalty in dollars. You don't have to confess your answers, just the amount of your fine.

Smoked pot -- $10
Did acid -- $5
Ever had sex at church-- $25
Woke up in the morning and did not know the person who was next to you -- $40
Had sex with someone on MySpace -- $25
Had sex for money -- $100
Vandalized something -- $20
Had sex on your parents' bed -- $10
Beat up someone -- $20
Been jumped -- $10
Crossed dressed -- $10
Given money to stripper -- $25
Been in love with a stripper -- $20
Kissed some one who's name you didn't know -- $0.10
Hit on some one of the same sex while at work -- $15
Ever drive drunk -- $20
Ever got drunk at work, or went to work while still drunk -- $50
Used toys while having sex -- $30
Got drunk, passed out and don't remember the night before -- $20
Went skinny dipping -- $5
Had sex in a pool -- $20
Kissed someone of the same sex -- $10
Had sex with someone of the same sex -- $20
Cheated on your significant other -- $10
Masturbated -- $10
Cheated on your significant other with their relative or close friend -- $20
Done oral -- $5
Got oral -- $5
Done / got oral in a car while it was moving -- $25
Stole something -- $10
Had sex with someone in jail -- $25
Made a nasty home video -- $15
Had a threesome -- $50
Had sex in the wild -- $20
Been in the same room while someone was having sex -- $25
Stole something worth over more than a hundred dollars -- $20
Had sex with someone 10 years older -- $20
Had sex with someone under 21 and you are over 27 -- $25
Been in love with two people or more at the same time -- $50
Said you love someone but didn't mean it -- $25
Went streaking -- $5
Went streaking in broad daylight -- $15
Been arrested -- $5
Spent time in jail -- $15
Peed in the pool -- $0.50
Played spin the bottle -- $5
Done something you regret -- $20
Had sex with your best friend -- $20
Had sex with someone you work with at work -- $25
Had anal sex -- $80
Lied to your mate -- $5
Lied to your mate about the sex being good -- $25

My fine is: $730.60. Dang, reckon I may have to find a bail bondsman if I don't straighten out my evil ways!

How much is your fine? I tag all of you, of course. Answer in the comment section and no cheating!

BURPPPPPPPPPP

The guys at work have ruined me! They ordered 10 whole chickens from one of the local hole-in-the-wall Bar-B-Que joints nearby and we've all just about eaten ourselves into a coma. In case you didn't know, some of the very best bar-b-que comes from the most disreputable looking establishments. Never judge the quality of the food by the shape of the building or the appearance of the people doing the cooking!

You haven't lived until you've had chicken slow cooked over a hickory fire with home-made Southern style white sauce (sorry to you Yankees, but y'all can't make white sauce for flip). The birds came with potato salad and baked beans, a full course of fine Southern cuisine.

Damn, I think I just popped the button off my jeans!

So much for my so-called diet. But it ain't my fault! These guys twisted my arm and made me eat! Oh Hell Yeah, that's exactly what happened!

Hey, it sounds like a good excuse so "THAT'S MY STORY AND I'M STICKING TO IT!" I'll start a diet tomorrow........... since today's already gone on the wings of a hickory smoked chicken and I've got a surprise birthday party to go to tonight......... and it's being held in a Mexican restaurant. You know I gotta eat again! It's a party and she's my very bestest friend and it would be rude to not go and I can't go and not eat and..... and....... and...............

Fuck it, I'm weak, so sue me. I'll probably drink a picture of margaritas to drown my shame.

SWEET HOME ALABAMA

It seems that Hollywood has taken a liking to my little part of Northern Alabama. First they made the movie "The Adventures of Huck Finn" in historic Mooresville right down the road from me and now I find out that the new release "Constellation" was filmed in Huntsville aka "The Rocket City".

I googled "movies made in Alabama" and was shocked at how long the list was! (the list is not complete, I couldn't find a complete list) Alabama is considered one of the most backward states in the country, who would have thunk that the movie industry loved us that much! I knew we had lots of stars born here: Kate Jackson (Charlie's Angels), Courteney Cox (Friends, Dirt), George Lindsey & George Lindsey (both from Gomer Pyle), Paula Poundstone (comedian) and Lucas Black to name just a few.

We've always been know for our music industry (Alabama Music Hall of Fame) and the huge number of our native musicians but many famous people were born and raised in Alabama and many famous people call Alabama their home today. This includes actors, athletes, authors, politicians and entertainers. These include the great boxer, Joe Louis who was born in Lexington and the infamous singer Nat King Cole, a native of Montgomery. Carl Lewis and Jesse Owens, both famous athletes were also born in Alabama.

After playing with Google for a bit I'm more proud of my home state than I've ever been! Too bad I wasn't one of her rich & famous daughters ..............

NEW LOOK

Well, I broke down and got my hair whacked off the other day, picture to be posted whenever I get someone else to take one. My new cut doesn’t look exactly like the photograph (for some reason a new hair cut never looks like the picture your stylist is going by, or is it just MY hair cuts?) but the “do” did turn out well. I’ve only washed it once and my hair usually takes about a week to train after it’s been reshaped so we’ll see what happens.

I walked into work this morning and got tons of compliments after only sticking my head under the shower and walking out the door with a wet head, finger-combing my newly short tresses in the car on the way to work. Remember, I’m the only female in my department and usually I have to shave my head before anyone notices around here so this is a big change.

Thanks for all the comments and support, I was truly and pleasantly surprised at all the male commentary. Who would have thought that men cared or noticed a woman’s crowning glory? Maybe it’s just that I’ve worked in a male dominated industry for so long that I’m considered “one of the guys” but even they noticed and had nice things to say!

I’m hoping this cut is the start of several changes. I went with Karen (today’s her birthday!) after getting my curls clipped and shopped for a new outfit to wear to Wendi’s (Donna’s only daughter) upcoming wedding. I knew that I need to lose some weight, but when I posed in front of those dressing room triple mirrors (you women know the ones!),
I swear I looked like a female sausage! Damn, do I really look like that or were those mirrors designed by the Devil himself! When the hell did I turn into Miss Piggy?

Looks like I’ve got to get off my abundant arse and motivate myself to sweat off a few pounds plus lay off the pasta and bread. Damn, I hate dieting but it seems that I have no other choice. I’ve got about 6 weeks to get in better shape before the event so I have a deadline to shoot for. Wish me luck.

PS: How'd ya like the new tag thingie that I snatched from apositivepessimist? If you didn't notice it, roll your mouse over one of the words underlined with dots and see what happens. Took me a bit to figure out the coding but by Goddess I did it all by myself! I'd stick out my chest in pride but it sticks out too far alreadyl

OLD GRAY MARE

Oh the old gray mare, she ain't what she used to be
Ain't what she used to be, ain't what she used to be.
The old gray mare, she ain't what she used to be
Many long years ago.

I've been dying my hair off & on since I was a teenager, hitting every color in Mother Nature's palette and few she never heard of; going from platinum to red to my natural reddish brown. Today I redid my roots and noticed that the gray has gone from a few strands sprinkled here and there to being about 50/50 and my lovely natural color has gone to a dull dark brown. Damn, when did that happen?

I don't usually go in for primping and such; I almost never wear makeup and I'm strictly a wash and go kinda gal, the only time I doll up is the few times I actually go out and even then I usually dress in my bestest jeans and a nice top with a minimum of paint & powder.

I hate doing my roots (it seems as if they grow out in like 2 days) and I'm seriously considering letting my natural hair color grow out and see how I look as "An Old Gray Mare". It wouldn't be such a hard decision if I was one of those people who have a lovely solid white hairdo instead of the salt and pepper thang going on, but I'm 51 and it's time that I quit fighting Mother Nature and see how badly she's treated me. I've found a short hair cut (on the right) that I love and I think that might be the best way to go about it. Cut off most of the dyed stuff and maybe start adding a few streaks as the gray grows out. Hey, if it gets too bad I can always go back on the "bottle"!

What do y'all think? Go "au natural" or dye until I die?

BEST OF BLOGS {BOB} AWARDS

Y'all be thinking of your favorite bloggers because it's time for the BOB Awards! Nominations for the BOB Awards will begin on Friday, February 2, 2007, and will run through midnight EST on February 16, 2007. Following the nomination period, voting begin on March 2, 2007 and the voting will end march 16, 2007 again at midnight EST. Winners in each category will be announced on March 19, 2007. blog winners will be presented their awards at The Blog World Expo is taking place at the Las Vegas Convention Center on November 8-9 2007, in Las Vegas, Nevada.

So be thinking of your favorite blogs in each of many different categories and on February 2 go and nominate them, then let everyone know to go and vote. They'll get to place a snazzy logo on their website and maybe even win.

HOROSCOPE

Saturday, January 20, 2007 ~Scorpio
Junebugg,
An unrealized well of knowledge is finally put to use. A breakthrough concerning your appearance is arriving. Focus on the way you present yourself; it should be open to inspection. Wait to take action, but begin your makeover preparations.

OK, what in hell does this mean? A new hair cut and/or color? Laser surgery to get rid of the specs? Boob reduction?

Heck, I want a full body lift, lipo, my sagging jowls lifted & my cheek bones rediscovered and maybe even a week or two in some trendy spa with a young virile Adonis serving me ice cold drinks while another worthy lad rubs sweet smelling oils on my newly defined body.

If I'm gonna dream, I'm gonna dream BIG!

BIG CRY BABY

“It’ll hurt”.
“Are you hurting now?”
“Noooooo....... but I’m not trying to do anything either. I feel just fine as long as I stay in this recliner”.
“Come on, you’ve got to walk sooner or later”
“It’ll hurt”.
“I know Darlin’, but the doctor said you have to get up and walk the soreness out or you’ll never get to feeling better”.
“But it’ll hurt, I know it’ll hurt. It hurts just thinking about it”.
“Now you know that you’ve got to go back to work in ONE WEEK! It’s gonna hurt a lot more when you have to climb ladders and turn wrenches.”
“I’ll move when I have to, and I don’t have to right now. Please go and get me something to snack on. Where’s the remote?”
“WALK! You’re not crippled, you’ve just gotten spoiled!”
“Yeah, I know but it’s different when you’re a man. Women don’t understand, men are sensitive down there. Just the idea makes ya hurt. I’ll get up and move around when I have to. Where did you say the remote was? Hey, you know maybe if we fooled around a little, I might not hurt as much....... You could always kiss it and make it better”.

"Oh Hell No! You're not blaming me for making you hurt. When you can walk farther than the bed then I'll think about some extra-curricular activities".

I've come to the conclusion that if men had to go through the pain of childbirth, the human race would have become extinct a long, long time ago.

I'm back at work and Sweet Thang is back at his place ALONE, so I guess he'll have to do a little walking since there's no one there to wait on him. Amazing that he can't walk to the 'fridge but he can drive his 5 speed truck.......

NIP & TUCK

I've been out of pocket for the last few days because Sweet Thang had to have out-patient surgery to remove several cysts from his balls nuts testicles. He got sliced and diced on Friday and is still moving slowly and can't ride in a car yet. No nookie is a given, it'll be a while before we can do the nasty but hey, some things are worth waiting for.

I can see all the guys grabbing their crotches and cringing as they read this, I know all the guys at work did when they heard why I'd be playing nurse this week. Actually, the poor feller was in so much pain before he went under the knife that the surgery has been a relief. The Doctor said he'll be as good as new in a couple of weeks. Until then both his parents and I are spoiling him rotten. By the time he gets healed up he won't be worth shooting!

What gets me is several of the men at work claim that they would rather stay in pain instead of getting cut in such a delicate area, and when I mentioned that it wasn't as serious as a woman having a hysterectomy they all got all ill tempered and loud. It seems that they think that because a female's sex organs are all on the inside that it doesn't count and as much as said so. Just goes to show what they know.

Sorry I haven't been visiting my regular blogs, but I promise I'll get around to you as soon as I can.

LIVING TOO LONG?

In other news, Yvonne De Carlo, who played Lily in the hit television comedy The Munsters, died Monday at age 84. I don't know about y'all, but I grew up watching the folks at 1313 Mockingbird Lane, Mockingbird Heights every week.

There goes another one of the icons of my long lost youth {{{sigh}}}.

Damn, I'm getting old!

BOOK MOOCH

I've found the most wonderful site! It's BOOK MOOCH, where you give away and recieve books from all over the world.

It costs nothing to join and the only out of pocket expense is shipping, but there's a 5:1 ratio: you have to send out at least 1 book for every 5 you receive. The system works off of a point system:

Action ~ Points
Add a book to inventory ~ + 1/10th
Remove a book from your inventory ~ - 1/10th
Give away book (within your country) ~ + 1
Give away book (to another country) ~ + 3
Mooch a book (within your country) ~ - 1
Mooch a book (from another country) ~ - 2
Acknowledge receiving a book you mooched ~ + 1/10th

You search for a book you want by title or topic, and if it's not available you can make a wish list and the site will you know when your requested books become available. You can also donate your points to a charity so that someone needy can recieve a book.

If you love to read the way I do this can save some money, plus maybe introduce us to new authors.

It's Time to Bust the Union Busters

We need this done before January 18th 2007.

Most of us never had to build our union. Others who came before us organized it. Today, workers trying to organize are often subjected to illegal activities by the boss to stop them from forming a union.

Most companies today whose workers want to exercise their right to form a union hire "union busters." These high priced lawyers are specialists at intimidation of workers. They routinely advise their clients to break the law by terminating union leaders, knowing they may never even be punished. Then, even if workers overcome all of the scare tactics and illegal firings, chances are the boss will never negotiate a contract with the workers.

The Employee Free Choice Act (EFCA) will give workers the ability to form a union in the workplace freely. This bill that was nearly passed in the House last session will:

1) Guarantee that if a majority of workers in a workplace sign a union card they have their union;
2) Provide stiff penalties for employers who break the law during organizing campaigns by their workers, and
3) Mandate that any first contracts not approved in a reasonable amount of time go to an arbitrator for final decision.

Take action today to pass the EFCA.

1. Check the attached list to see if your Representative is already a co-sponsor.
2. If not, call your Representative and tell them to co-sponsor the EFCA by calling Rep. George Miller's office and adding their name.
3. If / When your Representative has co-sponsored, call your U.S. Senators and tell them to do the same by calling Sen. Kennedy's office.
4. Report to your Rapid Response District Coordinator on new co-sponsors. (number & email at bottom)

When you call, tell your Representatives and Senators:

*1 in 5 leaders of union organizing campaigns are illegally fired.
*The EFCA will level playing field for workers to organize.
*This is America and no one should fear for their job just for trying to form a union!

Representatives Already Co-sponsoring EFCA ~ Representative/District /State

Ross/AR-04
Clay /MO-01
Grijalva/AZ-07
Butterfield/NC-01
Matsui/CA-05
Price/NC-04
Woolsey/CA-06
Miller/NC-13
Miller/CA-07
Pomeroy/ND
Lee/CA-09
Shea-Porter/NH-01
Tauscher/CA-10
Hodes/NH-02
Stark/CA-13
Andrews/NJ-01
Honda/CA-15
Rothman/NJ-09
Farr/CA-17
Payne/NJ-10
Sherman/CA-27
Holt/NJ-12
Berman/CA-28
Udall/NM-03
Schiff/CA-29
Berkley/NV-01
Waters/CA-35
Bishop/NY-01
Millender-McDonald/CA-37
McCarthy/NY-04
Baca/CA-43
Nadler/NY-08
Filner/CA-51
Velazquez /NY-12
Davis/CA-53
Maloney/NY-14
Salazar /CO-03
Engel/NY-17
Larson /CT-01
Hinchey /NY-22
Courtney/CT-02
Higgins/NY-27
DeLauro/CT-03
Kucinich/OH-10
Wexler/FL-19
Sutton/OH-13
Bishop/GA-02
Ryan/OH-17
Johnson/GA-04
Space /OH-18
Lewis/GA-05
Wu/OR-01
Abercrombie/HI-01
DeFazio/OR-04
Boswell/IA-03
Hooley/OR-05
Gutierrez/IL-04
Brady/PA-01
Davis/IL-07
Altmire/PA-04
Bean /IL-08
Murtha /PA-12
Schakowsky/IL-09
Schwartz/PA-13
Hare/IL-17
Doyle /PA-14
Donnelly/IN-02
Holden/PA-17
Carson/IN-07
Cooper/TN-05
Yarmuth/KY-03
Green/TX-09
Chandler /KY-06
Hinojosa/TX-15
Olver /MA-01
Green /TX-29
Capuano /MA-08
Moran /VA-08
Ruppersberger/MD-02
Welch /VT
Wynn/MD-04
Inslee /WA-01
Hoyer /MD-05
Baird /WA-03
Van Hollen/MD-08
McDermott/WA-07
Allen/ME-01
Baldwin /WI-02
Kildee/MI-05
Kind/WI-03
Kilpatrick /MI-13
Moore/WI-04
Conyers, Jr. /MI-14
Obey/WI-07
Dingell/MI-15
Kagen /WI-08
McCollum /MN-04
Mollohan /WV-01
Peterson /MN-07
Rahall /WV-03
Oberstar /MN-08


USW Rapid Response (412) 562-2291
http://www.uswrr.org
It's Time to Bust the Union Busters!

HOW DODGY ARE YOU?

Found this quiz at Carina's. Here's my results, it seems that I've been a bad, bad girl!

Scoundrel
More than a bit naughty - you're heading for a spot of bother at this rate - that is if you're not already inside. You don't have to be perfect, but if no one says you're a bad person, they're wrong. You are. Based on your answers, we have calculated the maximum penalty for your crimes*:
Years in prison: 111 - Potential fine: £7000

I don't think I'll live that long..........

NOW I LAY ME DOWN TO SLEEP

The feather touched lightly just below my elbow; slowly sensually stroking down and around my arm, a spiral trail crossing pallid blue traced skin. The shocking part is the moist crimson line marking the feather’s path, drops of blood welling up and gently rolling down my forearm like glistening red tears. But there’s no pain, no sensation of any kind. Only numbness and a solitary body part weeping bloody tears in silence.

I jerk straight up in bed....... panting for breath, my heart pounding in my chest. Only a dream, it was only a dream.......

AS THE COOKIE CRUMBLES

Tonight's Chinese take-out fortune cookie said:

Be prepared for extra energy.

Does that mean I'm gonna have some or that I'm gonna need some? I'm soooooooo confused..................

NEVER LET 'EM SEE YA SWEAT.......

I hope everyone had a Happy New year, I know I did! The place was packed, the band was rocking and for once there wasn't any bloodshed or mayhem. Sweet Thang and I both indulged in copious amounts of alcohol, partied until the band quit around 3:30 AM, staggered upstairs and passed out on what had to be the most comfortable bed I've ever lain on; Marriott has it going on I'm here to tell ya!

The next morning we checked out and hit IHOP where the waitress surprised us both by commenting that it was nice to see a couple who wasn't fighting after celebration New Year's together. I was amazed, she was serious and swore that almost every couple who has come in were feuding and fighting. WTF: why would we be fighting? Unless maybe someone kissed the wrong someone at midnight? Maybe it was just the hangovers talking ( I didn't have one, Yeah!) If I thought it would have caused a fight I wouldn't have gone. Then again, if 2 people can't enjoy a night out together without fighting maybe they shouldn't be together.................

In other news, some folks are getting a little carried away and personal with the New Year's resolution shit. I was standing in the check-out line at Hell-Mart while 2 strangers behind me discussed diets and how much weight they planed to lose when this one woman (who I had never seen before) turned to me and asked "How many pounds are you going to lose?"

What I wanted to say was "Bitch, it ain't none of your business!" but what I did was lock eyes with the nosey hussy (the way you would to show dominance to an over-aggressive dog) and state in a very condescending tone of voice "Haven't you heard all the medical reviews in the news that state dieting is unhealthy and leads to all kinds of eating disorders? I just plan to be healthy and happy and let the uneducated masses worry about a number on the scale" before checking out and walking away, leaving her & her friend in my dust with their mouths hanging open while she searched in vain for a suitable come-back.

I told the truth; All I want is to be healthy. To be able to spend an entire afternoon playing with my grandson, go for a long walk in the mountains or make love all night without getting out of breath and worrying about a heart attack. I don't care if I'm a size 2 or a 12 (although I would love to lose a pound or two), I just want to feel good in my own skin and be healthy and happy.