Tuesday, June 06, 2006

20 Ways to Know if You're a True Alabamian...

Everywhere I go, people hear my voice and exclaim "You must be from Alabama!". While it's true that 'Bama is considered the heart of the South you'll find almost the same accent and customs in most of our fine southern states.

Several of these 20 apply to some of y'all Yankees as well. Come on, admit it-Y'all can be just as redneck as the rest of us! I read somewhere that one of the signs of good mental health is the ability to laugh at yourself, and we Southerners have been doing that forever!

1. You can properly pronounce Conecuh, Cahaba, Opelika, Sylacauga, Oneonta, and Eufaula.
2. You think people who complain about the heat in their states are sissies.
3. A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look for a funnel. {Most of the people I know keep the video camera charged just for this reason!}
4. You know that the true value of a parking space is not determined by the distance to the door, but by the availability of shade.
5. Stores don't have bags or shopping carts, they have sacks and buggies.
6. You've seen people wear bib overalls at funerals. {We buried our Dad in his overalls, that's what he would have wanted. After all, since it's for eternity, he should be comfortable.....}
7. You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.
8. You measure distance in minutes.
9. You go to the lake because you think it is like going to the ocean.
10. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit. {That's just good common sense!}
11. You know cowpies are not made of beef.
12. Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding date. {I also know someone who used NASCAR to schedule a wedding}
13. You have known someone who has a belt buckle bigger than your fist. {We got a lot of cowboys and truck drivers down here!}
14. You aren't surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, beer, and bait all in the same store.{Hey, we invented One-Stop-Shopping!}
15. A Mercedes Benz isn't a status symbol- A Chevy Silverado Extended Bed Crew Cab is. {Bonus points if it's a 4X4}
16. You know everything goes better with Ranch Dressing.
17. You learned how to shoot a gun before you learned how to multiply.
18. You actually get these jokes and are "fixin'" to send them to your friends.
19. You have used your heater and air-conditioner in the same day!

You are 100% Alabamian if you have ever had this conversation:
20. "You wanna coke?" "Yeah." "What kind?" "Dr Pepper."

Y'all have a nice day now, ya hear!

P.S. Some of the folks who played the ABC game have posts up. Go and give them a holler.
Sandy had "A"
Pammy had "B"
Dan had "F"

1 comment:

Pisser said...


Someone sent this to me but I think they were from Arkansas...she always used to ask me if I had "any sacks" but with her accent, I thought she was asking me if I had sex, so we got a good laugh out of it :)