I've been flogged! Who knew that a well stocked freezer could be a health hazard?
When I went to put my new case of Sugar Free/Low Carb Vitatops in the freezer I was attacked by a monster-sized frozen chicken. The sucker leaped out from the top shelf, smacking the top of my foot hard enough to break the skin.
After doing a remarkable imitation of an Indian war dance, hopping around on one foot and screaming a few very choice fugly words (scaring the poor dog half to death) I hobbled in the house (the freezer is in an outside storage room) and announced to my son that I thought I had broken my foot. If I hadn't been in pain, the look on his face would have been priceless. I'm usually the doctor, not the patient.
After copious applications of ice and a few Aleve, I've decided that I just bruised the living hell out of it. It's still oozing blood and starting to turn colors that Crayola never manufactured but I believe that I'll live, although I doubt that I'll be wearing any shoes for a while.
Why does this shit always happen when I'm on vacation?